It seems Angel Reese’s love life—or lack thereof—is getting a comedic full-court press. The LSU star turned WNBA forward recently had her height dissected by none other than comedian Funny Marco. In a lively exchange on Reese’s podcast, Marco hilariously attributed her bold personality to her towering stature, setting off a playful (and occasionally sassy) back-and-forth that fans are still buzzing about.

“You’re tall as f**k, that’s why you can’t be submissive,” Marco teased in a now-viral clip posted by Hollywood Unlocked. “We need to find you somebody who can handle all that.” And by “handle,” Marco apparently meant someone who could metaphorically scale Mount Reese without gasping for air.

Naturally, Reese had questions. “Wait, does submissive mean being a soft girl?” she asked, clearly unimpressed by the stereotype. But Marco, in peak form, responded with an analogy that no one saw coming.

“You’re not a soft girl,” he declared. “You’re the booty-to-booty type. Like, you’re the one who rolls over in bed, turns your back, and expects the other person to do the same. No cuddling. Just straight back-to-back warfare.”

Reese wasn’t having it. “Hold up, I love cuddling,” she shot back. “I’m the little spoon, okay? Big spoon energy can miss me with that.”

But Marco wasn’t done playing matchmaker. When the conversation veered into Reese’s dating preferences, Marco suggested sitcom star Tyler James Williams. Reese quickly rebuffed the idea, explaining that her type is more “wholesome” and “God-fearing,” which—spoiler alert—rules out sitcom stars and, apparently, anyone not named Kirk Franklin.

Marco, undeterred, threw the gospel legend’s name into the mix, but Reese nixed the suggestion, citing Franklin’s, let’s say, “seasoned” age. “I’m not looking for a sugar daddy,” Reese quipped, her sarcasm on full display.

Then came the knockout punch. “I don’t do short kings,” Reese said, definitively shutting down Marco’s subtle attempt to throw his own hat into the ring.

Why Angel Reese Is a Solo Act—For Now

When the laughs settled, Reese got real about her current single status. She emphasized that self-improvement is her top priority. “I’m working on myself,” she said. “If I’m going to be in a relationship, I want to give 100%. No half measures.”

Translation? She’s not looking to shoot her shot unless she knows it’s nothing but net.

For those keeping score, Reese was previously linked to Detroit Pistons center Jalen Duren, but the WNBA star remains adamant that she’s still in the market for the ideal NBA beau—a tall one, of course. “Height is non-negotiable,” she joked.

The Takeaway

Whether she’s perfecting her on-court game or dodging short kings off it, Angel Reese is in no rush to trade her single-player mode for co-op. As for Marco? He’ll keep trying to deliver alley-oops, even if Reese swats them away with a laugh.

In the end, Reese’s love life might be as elusive as a buzzer-beating three-pointer, but at least she’s having fun in the process. And hey, as long as Marco’s around, the commentary will stay top-tier—booty-to-booty and all.